Feel like a Misfit?

If you were raised by a Narcissist parent, you felt like a misfit, and probably still do. From day one, the authentic you had no value to the Narcissist. You were molded into the people pleasing, nice, smiling, measured and selfless person you are today. You did not develop your own identity separate from the Narcissistic parent. The false self was created to appease the parent as autonomy and authenticity drained out of you.

The Narcissist parent creates an elaborately noisy stage where they were the lead in the play and you were there to quietly serve their needs, tend to their moods, and take the brunt of their rage. According to them you owe them (for bringing you into the world) after all, and you never did nor ever will measure up. You always fall short of their demanding expectations and are blamed for their sadness, anger, or general malaise.

As the victim to their bully, you find it difficult to trust as an adult. If your own parent would talk behind your back about you, lie, and rage, how can you trust anyone else?

So you go through life feeling as though you don’t belong. You are an observer, standing on the sidelines of life. You have yet to befriend the authentic you that was banished to the shadow.

Until you unpack the damage done, dissect the dynamics of the role you played from the start, and heal, you remain a…