1st Step of the 10-Step Recovery Program from Narcissists

Step 1: Detach From the Story

Whenever someone starts in on their ‘story’ about an ex, I know one thing for sure. They have not processed the experience. They are still in discovery mode about what happened, why, and how. The healing process begins as a jumbled-up mess of fragmented memories, feelings, and confusion.

To detach from the story is not about forgetting and forgiving. It is distancing yourself, your ego, from the experience long enough to get a less subjective view. You will become the observer of the story. You will begin to filter out and separate the ‘you’ that participated in the relationship from them. Healing begins with awareness and understanding of your inner workings. You will begin to understand your reactions.

You will look deeper into your triggers. What sets you off and pushes your buttons? Triggers are a road map to help you understand when and where old unhealed wounds originated. This roadmap leads you to the buried treasure of your unconscious operating system. You will be taken to the crossroad of your parental and social conditioning and the cornerstone of your soul’s purpose; this juxtaposition of enormous potential has been waiting in the shadows to be shaken out of its slumber and let loose to form your alchemy. All that was needed was the…